Can we
by annabanana6
Summary: Two chapters have been update: 6/2/2014, please don't miss it... Gail tries to tell holly something really important, that can be life changing but uses an approach that leaves. Holly in tears...this is my very first time writing Be gentle! Please all comments are welcomed but never did I think anyone would want like it
1. Chapter 1

Gail and Holly met in one of the most interesting places you expect two people too meet. In the woods of all the places, can you imagine meeting your other half like this? Neither one of them could have envisioned this. Gail sits in the place where they now call home. A cozy two bedroom apartment that reflections both of them in different aspects.

The sitting room wasn't too big but yet not too small, comfortable enough to hold each other's friends or families. Filled with pictures with memories that they both close them; Gail and Traci, Traci with Leo and Steve, Gail sneaking up on Holly. Sitting on the window stilt cuddled up in each other's embrace in this picture of all Gail looks happy. Not just happy but in love, no one can deny it not their respective exes, Gail's mother in the beginning who warmed up too Holly.

* * *

"_Gail are you okay there?"_ Holly asks looking worried about her girlfriend.

"_Baby, what's the matter? You're starting to scare me!"_ Holly is getting more concerned by the minute

"_Ummm…..yeah babe?"_ Gail answers clearly still in a daze.

Holly gets up from their couch, and walks over to the kitchen island where Gail is standing still not looking herself. She stands behind Gail and wraps her hand around her girlfriend's middle. Gail now snaps out of her dream state and slowly spins around and when she sees Holly's big brown eyes watching her in a way that turns her to mush every time.

Holly now leans in and gently places a soft, sweet and gently kiss too her girlfriend's lips. Gail immediately responses, this intended chaste kiss turns in too a passionate kiss that almost makes Holly forget that the real reason why she went over to see Gail in the first place. She reluctantly pulls away, Gail groans at the sudden loss of contact with those lips she knows she can't resist. She would give almost anything just too have a couple more minutes kissing them.

They both look flustered and almost out of breath when they part. _"What was that for?"_ Gail ask while keeping too get her hormones under control. Her girlfriend just smirks and takes Gail's hands and leads are back to the couch. They sit for a moment just staring into the other's eyes…..time passes but neither know how long, as they tend to get act up in each other's company.

Holly clears her throat, slides closer too Gail on the couch closing the space that no longer existed between them. Holly tries again to get her girlfriend's attention but before she can say another word…Gail interrupts her, since Gail rarely opens up but since they have been together. Gail is getting there, better than when they both first started dating. She smirks when she thinks bout on their two years together, brought a smile too her face but the smile faded when she remembers what she wanted too holly.

So she gets up and starts pacing back and forth slowly. Just as Holly is about to say _"baby, what's the matter you know…."_

Gail stops and lends against the structure closes too the kitchen….thinking how did I end up back over her but silences that thought when she sees Holly looking at her with such love, happiness, worry and something else she can't quite put her finger on.

She starts to speak again and say something that not even holly was expecting. _"Baby you know, I love you so much…..but I can't be your girlfriend anymore"_ she doesn't look at holly when she says this. Holly immediately starts too panic "_Gail…..what are you talking about, baby what do you mean by 'you can't be my girlfriend anymore'_ ". Trying not getting too worked up but after hearing the love of your life say something like that. She pleads "_Gail, please tell me you don't mean that? Tell me you are joking!_" as tears begin too stream down her face. She thought **how could Gail do this, we are happy and in love. Where is this coming from?**

Gail immediately regrets using this approach, she thought it would be sweet and romantic but it's anything but that. She walks over to girlfriend and kneels down and wipes the tears from her eyes that are cascading down holly's face. She say "_Baby please don't cry, I'm sorry please forgive me….."_


	2. Chapter 2

Gail immediately regrets using this approach, she thought it would be sweet and romantic but it's anything but that. She walks over to girlfriend and kneels down and wipes the tears from her eyes that are cascading down holly's face. She say "_Baby please don't cry, I'm sorry please forgive me….."_

* * *

After wiping the tears from her girl's eye she proceeded to take Holly's face into her hands and lifted it, as so she can look into those big brown eyes that she finds herself. Being mesmerized by, caressing the other woman's now tear strained cheeks. She got up first then slowly pulled the doctor up into an embrace she hoped showed Holly that she would never intentionally hurt on purpose or accidentally.

After a long period of time Gail tried to pull away but Holly wasn't quite ready to let go, she thought **my whole world is about to come crashing down, I'll try and hold on a little longer just a little tighter. **After another long embrace holly break the hug and sat back down. Now that she had a little time to think rationally as compared to a half hour ago. She tears her face while her face was still red and her eyes puffy from earlier.

Gail takes a deep breath and started to speak but only for what she had been thinking to say suddenly caught in her throat.

_It could have been about eighteen months ago, no she was 100% certain it was eighteen months ago. They were having dinner at Holly's it was a usually dinner that they had, it soon became a routine like but this one night wasn't like the others. Gail realized that Holly was acting different but she couldn't quite figure it out but as the night progressed she noticed the other woman wasn't being as focused as she would normally be._

_Finally the younger woman was getting upset with every passing moment, _**why was Holly acting like this, what could be wrong. Is something wrong? Has she become tired of me already **_all this thoughts passed through her mind and with every moment that they remained quiet, it got worst. Gail said "Sweetie, you're thinking aloud?" The older woman said "hmm…..huh?" and finally caught her bearings and after silence filled the already quiet room. She did it, she asked "Baby I feel we are in the right place in our relationship…..Gail would you like too maybe, you don't have to if you don't want too. Move in with me?"_

_The room got silent once again, the older woman tensed and ducked her head as if to make herself smaller. Gail decided finally to give her girlfriend an answer, "Holly there is nothing I rather do than live with you, and I love you"_

That memory truly put a smile on her face, she looked at her girlfriend who just sat there watching her with a puzzled look. After all the younger woman was smiling and at such a weird moment.

* * *

"_Holly, I didn't mean it too come out like that? I was trying to be romantic but as you can see I'm failing horribly" _Gail said with her head currently bent down. Holly ran her hand through her hair and sighed, "_What are trying to tell me because right now I'm confused as hell. You say you don't want to be my girlfriend anymore, now you say you were trying to be romantic?"_

The younger woman could see how what she was doing could be seen as confusing, so she moved over to her girlfriend's side and take her hands into holly's. They stare into each other's eyes both finding different answers, the younger woman finding love, compassion, worry, sadness and one of where is she going with this. The doctor finding nervousness, love, anxiety, and one there's something really huge I have to get off my chest but how do I say it. Holly chuckles why can't this girl just say what's on her mind instead of having me going through all this, I just hope it's not what I don't want it to be.

_I just hope it's not what I want it to be, please don't be this end. God knows I would move heaven and earth for this insanely but beautiful creature._

* * *

Gail opens her mouth "_Holly, van you please follow me too the roof! There's something really important I want to show you."_ She stretches forth her hands and takes the older woman up to the roof. When the doctor reaches the roof, she opens her eyes in pure excitement. Wow she thought, now what was Gail trying to tell me.

Gail steps in forward and licks a switch by the entrance and holly's eyes widen….


	3. Chapter 3

The scene before holly is one of sheer astonishment, never in a wildest dreams could she have ever expected that this is what Gail wanted to show her. She literally had too blink a few times, she even went as far as putting her eyes up too her eyes and rubbing them a few times. But yes she wasn't dreaming or imagining what she was seeing before her eyes, Gail did the impossible.

The roof of their apartment building was spacious so it made what Gail had in mind possible to create, but before she started with decorations or anything in that area.

* * *

She sorted a guess list with some very important people to whom her girlfriend had not seen in a while. With the fact that the older woman was paying her cousin in Montreal a visit it gave the younger woman ample time to get started, about three days to be exact. So after dropping the doctor off to the airport she made haste back to their apartment, thanking all that was good and sane she had a week off which was too end in five days.

Gail had been planning on doing this for some time but only got the courage about a week ago and then all that was left was too figure out how to do it, that would be hard part and she was right. She made a list of all the things she needed to do:

_. get rid of Holly for a little while_

_. get her friends over at fifteen too help, even acquiring the help of Steve_

_. get the all clear from the building manager_

_. get into contact with Holly's friends and coworkers but the hardest one of all was the older woman's parents, since they were in Europe on business. _

Holly's parents were every accomplished people her dad was head surgeon at a prestigious hospital and her mom was a lawyer and a partner at one of the end law firms in Toronto. She decided to tackle the last part first since that was the hardest, after spending almost all of the day trying to get into contact with and finally was she was about to give up she got through and she asked if they could come back for a very special and important day in their daughters lives. They said they could arrange some stuff and they would be there. With the biggest issue out of the way she got on with the rest of the plan.

With everything going according to plan she was ready with everything the day before her girlfriend was supposed to be back.

* * *

Holly look around and saw all her friends, some she had not seen a while due to the fact they either left the city for a job or another reason they were all in one place. Not even watching at the decorations or at the fact Gail had disappear entirely from her presence. The roof has twinkling crystal lights running all over the wall above the door frame. A table laid out with snacks and all her favourite foods even had a lemon and cream upside down cake which she loved and didn't even know Gail could find one in the city. She adore when her mom would make her that cake on special occasions as not too erase the special effect Holly would feel.

A silent tear trickled down her cheek when she thought of her mom, the doctor had not seen her parents in over six months and although they skyped every other week it still wasn't the same and she missed her parents but her mother most of all. The sky was clear tonight she thought you could even see a few twinkling stars.

* * *

_She remembered when she first told Gail that she loved her was cool night they had strolled through the park and came too and halt by an old wooden swing that they passed every time they would take this path through the park. The doctor decided that right there and then she couldn't hold it in any longer she had to tell the blonde that she loved her because she felt like she was bursting at the seams by keeping it in this long. When she told her most favourite person in the world those three words, the reaction she got wasn't what she expected the blonde starting cry. Holly panicked thinking what did I say was it so wrong or maybe she doesn't feel the…..all her thinking was silenced when Gail crashed her lips into the other woman's. When they parted she simply said "Ditto" all the older woman could do was chuckle and wrapped her arms tightly around her girlfriend that was twenty one months ago._

* * *

She turned back around and saw that it was not only her friends and coworkers that were there but also all of Gail's friends, Steve and her parents were there but yet no sight of her girlfriend. She made her way over too her girlfriend's parents and brother making small conversation. Simply hi's and how are you doing but while all this was going on she felt someone tap her on the shoulder she spins around hoping its Gail because all that is missing is Gail. She needs to hold her and kiss her and also to find out what happen earlier downstairs with her girlfriend but she isn't going to find out now considering who she sees when she turns around.

Her parents she couldn't believe her eyes once again her girlfriend has done something so sweet and sincere she smiles her signature lopsided smile. She hugs them tightly, first her dad gives a bear hug like when she young and gives a big kiss on her forehead. Now it was mom's turn that hug was so gentle but also very loving both theirs eyes begin too water, then she pulls away and thinks. "_Wait a minute, mom the cake was that you? How did you reach here? What are you guys doing here? "Her_ mother replies, in the exact order she was asked "_yes, your girlfriend called us and told us just too be here for something really important" _By the way where is that girlfriend of yours, her daughter's reply was a just a simply shrug of the shoulders.

They moved too an end of the roof where there was an empty table that a single vase of flowers and spent about an hour talking, simply catching up. Holly found it weird that she hasn't seen the younger woman in almost three hours, she excused herself from her parents and set in search of her but after looking for about twenty minutes too no avail she found Traci. "_Where is she? Have you see Gail?" _Traci just smiled shyly and turned her around and then she saw her girlfriend at the other end of the room. Smiling and Gail walked over to the middle of the roof and stopped, signaling for the doctor too walk over and she did because honestly she couldn't deny her girlfriend.

Holly was so happy to see her girl that she practically fast walked over and hugged her Gail so tightly then pulled back and said _"what is going on here, babe?" _the only reply she got was _"it's all for you"._

Gail the proceeded to pull away and walked over the table and got the microphone, _"I asked you here all too ask this woman, before you here. The love of life too be….."_

* * *

**I look forward to all your reviews and comments, I still can't believe the amazing responses that I am receiving. What do you think is going to happen next?**


	4. Chapter 4

Holly was so happy to see her girl that she practically fast walked over and hugged Gail tightly then pulled back and said _"What is going on here babe?" _the only reply she got was:

"_It's all for you."_

Gail then proceeded to pull away and walked over the table where she grabbed the microphone, _"I asked you all here to ask this woman, before you, the love of my life to be..."_

* * *

Gail had to leave to compose herself to prepare for what she about to do, she had slipped out after she had brought the doctor up to the roof and switched on the lights. She came back down to their apartment and headed straight for the bedroom and sat on the edge of their king size bed. She had been nervous all day but now that it was getting so close she had to take deep breaths just to calm down. After what had seemed like forever her breathing steadied and she got up went over to the gun safe, she turned the combination lock until she heard a click then opened it. There it was, something so small but it would bind them together forever and she couldn't think of anything else she would rather do. She didn't even have to think about it, there was nothing else in the world that she could see herself doing.

The box was small enough to fit in the palm of her hand, it was teal in colour, her girl's favourite colour. Gail blushed whenever she thought about the older woman, she had an effect on Gail and although she wouldn't admit it the doctor had the same problem. She used her free hand to open the box and there it was the medium that would make Holly hers forever and with that thought a single tear trickled down her cheek. She wiped the tear away and went to the bathroom to check her makeup and ready herself. It was now or never, her nerves were getting the best of her. She inhaled and exhaled one last time and made her way back up to the roof.

* * *

Before Gail was even able to finish what she was saying, she looked back to the doctor and saw that tears were beginning to form from behind her glasses. Gail did only thing she thought she could do, she walked back over to her girlfriend and lift her chin so that Holly was staring directly at her. _"Baby, why are you crying? Is something the matter?" _

The doctor's response, _"I'm okay, I'm just so happy."_ Gail placed the mic on a nearby table, turning back to the person in front of her and taking off her glasses, also placing them on the table.

She leaned in and slowly wiped her girlfriend's cheek. Gail then kissed her; it was intended to be a quick peck but the older woman lingered for a moment longer, it seem as if they forgot about the people around them. When they pulled apart the younger woman gave a look, silently asking if she was ready, Holly immediately nodded that she was okay, so blond stepped back to the table picked up the mic and glasses. She handed the glasses back but the doctor didn't put them on.

Gail moved back to her original place on the roof and began to speak after clearing her throat. _"Sorry for the interruption folks, but after all it is Holly's night so I had to make sure that she was okay. I would like to thank you all for coming. Now for the reason why I called you all here. Some of you remember the story of how we met, if not it was a funny one. This amazing woman standing in front of me, came into my crime scene and took my breath away. Never had I seen such beauty in one place. But it wasn't an instant pull with getting together, I denied it for as long as I could until one day I was like 'this girl gets me the real me'. We didn't have it easy, no couple does, but I think it has made us stronger. She taught me to trust, to know what is to have someone in corner no matter what. I still don't have it all sorted out but with her I'm getting there."_

Gail pauses to calm her voice, it's beginning to crack whenever she thinks of all that Holly means to her, all that she has done for her. She now is tearing up but it isn't bad so she tries to finish what she trying to say before it becomes too hard to speak.

"_Baby, what I was saying earlier when I said I couldn't be your girlfriend anymore… what I meant was I'm passed being just that. I want to be your friend, your best friend, your lover (well I'm already that 'sorry parents'). I want to be the person you come to when you need a shoulder to cry on. The one you turn to when you have good news about work, how your day went, a joke you heard. I want to be the one you come to when someone upset you 'hopefully not me'. Holly you mean the world to me, I still don't know how I got so lucky with you and I want to spend the rest of my life showing you that how lucky I feel."_

Gail walks over to Holly, they are both crying but its tears of joy and the younger woman kneels in front of her lady. Taking the box out of her jacket pocket and opens it as Holly slowly but surely drops to her knees as well. Gail with the open box and says those magical words but with a twist that she borrowed from her girl _"Will you be my plus one forever?" _

The doctor can't help as fresh tears come cascading down her face. She takes the mic and says _"For forever and ever babe!"_

The blond takes the ring from the box and places it on the other woman's finger, it's a perfect fit. They hug, it is almost like a gravitational pull and then they pull away and kiss, now this one wasn't a chaste kiss or a quick peck but a passionate one. As they are about to deepen it, they realize they aren't alone so Gail stands and pulls her blushing fiancée up.

The crowd is cheering and clapping, so Gail takes to the mic and says _"She said yes, you heard her! This woman just agreed to be my wife and has made me the happiest person in the world!"_ Holly is blushing and smiling uncontrollably as everyone makes their way over to them congratulate them.

After speaking to both sets of parents and their friends, the music starts. Whitney Houston's 'I Have Nothing' plays on the radio, so the older woman walks over to her wife-to-be and extends her hand asking _"May I have the honour of this dance?" _the blond doesn't even need to reply and Holly sweeps her over to the dance floor.

_**You see through right to the heart of me**_

_**You break down my walls with the strength of your love**_

_**I never knew love like I've known it with you**_

_**Will a memory survive, one I can hold on to**_

_**I don't really need to look very much further**_

_**I don't want to have to go where you don't follow**_

_**I won't hold it back again, this passion inside**_

_**I can't run from myself**_

_**There's nowhere to hide**_

_**Your love I'll remember forever**_

They laugh and dance, as the doctor admires her ring, its white gold slim band with a unique shape, two dolphins swimming a circle around an emerald, the stone is clear cut. She gushes even more when she thinks about the fact that she saw this ring with Gail a few months back but didn't think much about. The younger woman says _"Babe you're thinking aloud."_

She replies_ "I'm just so unbelievably happy, a few hours back I thought you wanted to break up with me. Only to realize now you want to marry me, and I just can't wait to be your wife." _Gail doesn't even reply she just kisses her girlfriend…oh wait she can't call her that anymore, her fiancée.

* * *

**Special thanks too my beta reader - ragingscooter**

**This was intended too be a one shot but I felt I had more too say, so this as far I got but I may add more but I don't know when. If anyone has idea or could think of anything to add, please say.**

**As always review please!**


	5. Chapter 5

They danced for hours, long after everyone else left. It was as if no one else or anything else existed when they were in each other's presence. It was about three in the morning when they eventually made it downstairs and they went straight to the bed. Holly laid facing Gail almost mirroring each other, the younger woman pulled close to her lady and lifted one hand to pull other closer so that it seemed no space existed between them. Using the other hand to caress the doctor's cheek, the older woman seem lost in her own little world, she didn't even realize that the blond was staring at her.

That lingering touch seemed too snap her out of her trance, _"Hmmm."_ in reply. Gail just smiled at her but the other woman could've sworn she saw her smirk, and just like that the blond leaned and kissed her. It was a slow and gentle kind of kiss, neither of them rushing just enjoying the other's company. They eventually broke apart and all they did was smile like a couple of teenagers who had just discovered love. _"I love my ring but when did you have time to plan it all?"_

Gail remained silence for a few moments just observing her wife to be, the only light in the room came from the moon light that shined through the open windows. She told it all, the older woman's heart melted more as the blond revealed it all.

Never in her wildest dreams did she think Gail…her Gail could be so romantic, sure she did show her love in actions but after hearing all that the blond, not to mention what she said in front of their friends and family. She thought back to what Gail said about being lucky and now she wondering how she got so lucky. _"Baby, I am the lucky one. I have been in loved before but nothing could've prepared me for this feeling. I love you more than anything else in the world and I can't believe I'm about to become your wife. And I'm about to show you how much!"_ With that she pulled her girl even closer, whilst the younger wondered how they could be closer but she welcomed the kiss. Holly started by kissing her lips with one of longest most breathtaking kisses ever. It intensified in no time and then she peppers kisses down the blonde's jaw and down her neck before settling on her collar bone. Holly moved to laying on top of Gail, kissing her while she began to suck, nibble and smooth the younger woman's…

* * *

**A couple of weeks later**

Gail was at work in the D's office, yes she's now a detective. It happened a little while after the engagement, they all had went out to celebrate. She would always goes down to check on Holly in the morgue. They had been having lunch together every day for the past two weeks but not today. It was after four in the afternoon and Holly hadn't seen her favourite cop. She found it weird but shrugged it off because Gail had been yapping about a case they had caught earlier but when midnight came and went and she still hadn't seen the younger woman in over twenty hours she started to panic.

She called Chris, Dov, Andy, Oliver, Steve and Traci too but it all proved futile, no one was answering. This was when she began to freak out. All of the worst case scenarios she could think about popped into her head but she tried to push them out. Holly decided to try calling them again and again. After calling for about two hours she finally got through to someone, it was Traci.

_Holly: "Hi Trace, sorry too call you so late."_

_Traci: "Don't worry it's no problem. Something the matter?"_

_Holly: "Yes, have you seen my fiancée…ummm Gail? Have you? Do you know  
where she is?"_

Traci could hear that Holly's voice was beginning to crack.

_Traci: "No…why? Okay, Holly calm down when last did you see her?"_

_Holly: Not since earlier the other morning, when she left for work!" _

_Traci: "This is strange, Gail left work at six and said she was going straight home."_

_Holly: "Dammit, she hasn't been home yet and I'm worried. She would always call…"_

_Traci: "Sweetheart hold on, I'm getting another call."_

After what seem like an eternity Traci returned…

_Traci: "Holly I am going to tell you something but please try not to overact but  
something happened…"_

_Holly: What?! Traci, what do you mean by that…..what happened, is she  
okay?"_

_Traci: "Holly, I'm coming over. We need to talk, it is important give me 10 minutes."_

And with that Traci hung up and made her way over, reaching the Peck/Stewart home in a record six minutes. She buzzed and heard a click and went straight to the seventh floor. Before she even began to knock the apartment door swung open and the first thing she saw was a teary eyed brunette, who motioned for the other woman to enter.

Traci sat down and explained to Holly that the phone call she got a little while ago was one telling her that a detective had been involved in a hold up at a Chinese place. The two assailants were apprehended, one being shot in the leg and other was okay in police custody and only one other person was hurt.

Holly turned pale _"Who is it? Tell me it wasn't Gail? Tell me that she is okay please…"_ She tried her best to keep all her tears at bay but when Traci didn't reply she got up and walked over to the kitchen. This is when she lost it and the tears started to flow.

Traci followed her, _"I'm here to take you to the hospital" _

"_Traci, why do you need to take me to there? Just tell me what's wrong."_

"_Gail has been shot; once in the leg and twice in the abdomen." _and with that Holly saw her entire world crumpled into tiny pieces as she got up to go over to Traci but then her whole world turned dark.

When Holly woke up she was lying down on her couch and another person had joined them. For a moment Holly couldn't place the man but then she recognized that it was Steve. _"Would someone please tell me that I was dreaming, and Gail is alright?" _ She got no reply, just somber looks from the other two people and it looked like Gail's brother had been crying.

They thought it best to take Holly to the hospital, not trusting her drive for herself. Two of them being in hospital wouldn't help anyone.

They reached the hospital in record time. Holly flew out the car and into the emergency room where she saw what she thought was a sea of blue. There were a lot of officers there, some she knew from work and others were unfamiliar but when her eyes found Gail's friends her eyes began to water once again. She walked over to them, more like speed walked as she pulled Chris into a tight hug then Dov and then Oliver following the other officers. She asked if any of them had seen her or knew what her condition was. They all shook their heads which made her hope that it could be good but she knew better considering her year she did working as trauma doctor before branching off to being a pathologist.

They all sat there for hours until a doctor emerged into the waiting room. "_Ms. Peck's family please? Is a Ms. Stewart here?" _Holly slowly rose out of her seat and was followed by Steve and Gail's Parents. They were informed that detective was in critical but stable condition at the moment, they got the two of three bullets out; the one in her leg and one from the abdomen but there was still one lodged in Gail's spleen and they couldn't take it out at that time but they were going to operate on her again. The surgeon warned them that the chances of the policewoman surviving were slim because of the amount of blood she lost and where the bullets hit.

Now that was the final nail in Holly's coffin. She broke down right there in front of everyone luckily Steve was standing close by because that was all that saved the brunette from falling to the ground. Gail's parents were crying, her mother was a wreck almost inconsolable. But she wasn't as sad as compared to Holly who since her breaking down a couple of hours before hadn't said a single word or moved an inch.

The doctor returned later and said that the operation was successful. They had been able to remove the bullet but had to take the spleen out, but the detective was coming along fine. The doctor cautioned them that she wasn't out of the woods yet and had slipped into a coma. They were told that if anyone wanted to go see her they could for a few minutes. The pathologist opted for everyone else to go in before her. It wasn't that she didn't want to see Gail but she didn't think she could handle seeing her lying in bed with wires strapped to her. So she made her way to the hospital chapel and went to the front where she kneeled and prayed, something she hadn't done in years.

"_God please, I don't usually ask for anything in fact I only ever asked once for anything so please can you bring her back to me? She is kind, generous, loving and sometimes when she thinks no one is watching she's such a goof. I love her so much and I can say for sure she changed my life and I cannot live my life without her and I refuse too. Gail Peck is my world and everything I do is for her and I would do anything for her. It's been two years but it feels like I only just met her and you can't take her away from me yet. You can't, you just can't just take her. Bring her back to me and I will care for her, love her and heal her wounds and body with love…so please I'm on my knees, begging please, my life is nothing without her and I rather die."_

* * *

**First I'd like to say I can't write smut too save my life. The story is taking an interesting turn so please bear with me. I love to thank my beta reader: ragingscooter for their help…. Please reviews, issues and comments are welcome. **


	6. Chapter 6

Holly went spent nearly two hours in the chapel just crying her eyes out all the while silently pleading with all of her heart that; _her friend, her best friend, her companion, her lover, her fiancée, her wife to be…but most of all her reason to breathe _would survive, she prayed Gail would fight for their love and Holly would do the rest when she came too. She eventually made her way back to the waiting room and was shocked to say the least when she saw all of their friends there. It took all she had in her not to breakdown again but she managed to hold it together.

Traci pulled her friend aside, they became really close over time. _"Holly, how are you doing?" _

She replied _"I'm…umm good now." _

"_Sweetie you can talk to me, you know that right?" _and with that she broke again. _"I'm scared to go see her, I can't bear to see her attached to all those machines. We were supposed to go cake tasting, get floral designs and discuss the seating arrangements. I mean we are getting married in six weeks…she can't leave me, not now….not when we are supposed to have forever….." _Traci had to pull Holly into a comforting hug that reminded that she wasn't alone and that she had to stay strong. She just needed to think about how much the Gail loved her.

* * *

Holly made her room into the blonde's hospital room, what she saw before her made any happy thoughts she had vanish. Gail was lying on a hospital with wires all over her porcelain skin, her left thigh was bandaged but she was thankfully that the hospital gown was covering her midriff, she didn't need to see it bruised as well. Shuffling her feet at a snail like pace until she reached the bedside. The doctor wanted to kiss her forehead but it was covered with gauze, which puzzled her why was the younger woman's head wrapped at all, no one said anything about a head wound. Her right hand had the I.V line and the left hand had a heart monitor clip attached. Since she was a doctor she proceeded to look at the chart.

Patient: Gail Peck

Age of patient: 27

Time of arrival: 8:30 pm

Injuries: three gunshot wounds (left thigh and two in the abdomen), 6 bruised ribs,  
a concussion and broken collarbone.

Holly placed the chart back in its original place and she found her place in the chair by the bed railing. She inhaled deeply before making any moves to touch her girl. She placed her hand on the younger woman's hands trying not to move any wires. Sitting there for what felt like forever, she decided to tell Gail something in hopes she would hear it and wake up. The doctor knew what she was hoping for was like asking God for a miracle but she needed to do something.

"_Baby can you remember the night that you proposed? Of course you do." _she laughed a little remembering how Gail practically boasted that she got the greatest gift in the world when Holly agreed to marry her. She cleared her throat and wiped a tear that she had shed. _"I was going to propose to you! But you just had to beat me to it, I was going to do on our anniversary, the day that I received the second greatest gift of my life. The day you agreed to be my girlfriend."_

* * *

Holly had been planning for a week to take Gail to her parents' summer home on the lake. They would spend the weekend there, they would put down their belongings and take a walk, taking in the sights of the lake. There was a peace that the older woman found every time she visited, she would spend days at a time away from civilization, away from the stresses of life but since she met the blonde she never found a reason to come back there until now, although she had different purpose in mind this time. It would be getting dark and she would've sent her girlfriend to change into something nice since they were going to be having a nice dinner. Holly would get ready in one of the many guest rooms equipped with a bath, she also wanted to steel her nerves and she knew if she got ready with Gail that they would've probably ended up never leaving the room. They would meet downstairs and Holly would escort them outside, around to the back and up the spiral staircase which would be a task to climb in dresses.

Upon reaching the roof where there would be a romantic setting for two next to the rooftop pool, slow music playing the background. A thick plastic material was placed over the water to give the appearance as if walking on water, it would take anyone's breath away and she hoped it would have the same effect on her girlfriend. They would have dinner under a star filled sky, hopefully a light breeze would blow as so they wouldn't freeze.

After eating Holly would probably need to excuse herself for a few moments to steel her nerves once more but she would return in a timely fashion as not to get the blonde antsy. She come back to her seat and bring it closer to her girl and she would propose…

* * *

Her thoughts were cut short when she heard the machines start to beep, immediately she started to panic, _"No! No! No! God I begged you to bring her back to me, you can't take her away!" _she screamed. When a team of nurses and doctors came in to stabilize the blonde they told she had to leave she was about to protest until she thought about how she couldn't see her like this. So she left; not because she didn't want to be there but she couldn't see the love of her life like that…

She found a seat in a remote part of the hospital and called her mom, the phone went straight to voicemail. She hung up, she didn't want to speak to an automated system when she needed her mom. After ten minutes her phone rang and the caller ID showed it was her mom.

_Holly: "Mom?"_

_Mrs. Stewart: "Yes, baby girl what's wrong? Have you crying?"_

_Holly: "Mom, I don't know what to do. I'm so scared, it's Gail…"_

_Mrs. Stewart: "What happened, Hollycakes?"_

_Holly: "She's was involved in a holdup on her way home and she was shot…"_

Holly told her mother what happened, pausing between breaths to either clear her throat or to sniffle.

_Mrs. Stewart: "Sweetheart, I'm so sorry to hear this, don't worry she'll pull  
through. She's really strong and she loves you so much."_

_Holly: "Mom I know but I don't know what I'll do if she doesn't make it?  
I'm so afraid, it does not look good, and she already slipped into a coma….  
Hold on, I'm getting another call."_

_Mrs. Stewart: "Okay honey."_

_Holly: "Mom, I have to call you back."_

_Mrs. Stewart: "Is everything alright? Do you need me to come, I can be there be there in ten minutes."_

_Holly: "Please mom? I need you."_

The other call was from the nurse's station informing her that Gail had coded. Holly literally flew down the stairs. She was just in time because the doctor just came out to give the news. He told them that Detective Peck had coded three times but they have stabilized her for now but that the next few hours are going be touch and go.

* * *

**Three Days Later…..**

Holly hadn't gone home and she wouldn't leave Gail's side. She was almost asleep in her chair when she heard someone say "Holly." She opened her eyes to see her favourite person in the world staring at her.

"_Gail?" _the older woman replied.

"_Yes, Holly?" _The doctor was so happy that her girlfriend… fiancée was wake.

* * *

**Special thanks to ragingscooter for beta reading my fic once again**

**Sorry for taking so long to update was finding hard as too where this fic is going not the wedding because it will happen but in between is the question. On that note if anyone have any ideas or suggestions please PM or comment.**


	7. Chapter 7

CHAPTER SEVEN

_Holly's pov_

"_What happened? Where am I?"_ Holly is so happy that she's awake that she takes a moment longer and releases a breath that she has been holding since she had heard the news. Taking a deep breathe, she edges closer to her all whilst trying not to disturb all the wires she has on and around her.

"_Babe, I'm so glad that you're awake. You're in the hospital but you're awake and that's all that matters"._ Holly is only aware that she is crying when Gail asks her, why there are tears streaming down her face.

It has been a few hours since Gail had woken up and the waiting room is buzzing with everyone from family members, friends to almost the entire 15th division. Holly wonders if there is anyone left in the station but her thoughts are quickly interrupted when she spots her mom, she has been here for her since Holly called her panicking three days ago but unlike Holly she has left the hospital a few times. Always returning with change of clothes for her along with toiletries, Holly has been given a chance to change in the nurses' lounge because of the few friends Holly has made since working with 15.

Holly has been with Gail since the moment she woke up yesterday and even though she begged her to go home and get some rest or go to work but she has refused every request she has made. Always making some excuse to why she can't leave her.

**Three months later…..**

Gail's pov

Gail is still at home and she isn't due at work for another three months but she won't have active duty for another six months. Holly isn't so thrilled that she will be going back out even if it isn't for a while. The younger woman has been making progress, taking therapy but other than that she has been taking it easy. Holly spent the first six weeks with her, her boss has been understanding allowing her to do her work from home. Since she is one of the head pathologists she has been reviewing reports from home and only having to go in every three days for two to three hours to deal with important matters.

Holly has been true to her word taking care of her lady and she absolutely adores Holly for everything she has done for her but still gives Holly hell when it seems like she is doing everything for her. The two of them have gotten closer although she doubt that was even possible but no talk of the wedding has been made by either of them. Until today…

"_Holly do you still want to get married to me after all this?"_ Gail asks.

"_What do you mean?" _

"_I mean, you know I love you more than anything in world and I would do anything for you nothing is too much but…" _

"_But what, baby? We don't have to talk about this now!" _Holly says from across the room.

"_But we should, you deserve so much but I can't give it to you. I can't even lift anything heavier than five pounds and even that is a hassle." _

"_Gail what are you trying to say? You don't want to me anymore?" _Tears are threatening to fall, her big dreamy eyes glistening with a glassy effect.

"_Holly, listen to me I would marry you anyplace, anytime… I would marry you this every second. All that I'm saying is…you are the most kind hearted, generous, loving person I know but you don't deserve to be tied down to someone like me. I mean for god sake, Hol look at me." _

The doctor is so quiet that Gail doesn't know what to say or do anymore but sit and stare as she waits for her girl to say something…anything. She doesn't have to wait too long. The older woman walks over and takes a seat on the couch close to Gail but does not invade her personal space because she needs the blonde to hear what she's about to say. _"Baby listen to me, I love you so much, marrying you is the only thing I can see myself doing today, tomorrow or any day after that. When I heard what happened to you I almost died, I did. I can't imagine my life or any life without you and I don't have any intention to." _Holly stood up and walked away leaving Gail speechless, any thoughts she may have had were interrupted when she heard the bedroom door open and then close. Holly walks towards her with tears in her eyes, they may have been threatening to fall before were definitely falling now. She stops in front of Gail and kneels down talking the other woman's two hands in her own, clear her throat and with a look that screams **here goes nothing. **_"Gail, the night you proposed, do you remember that?" _Gail nods and sniffles as Holly continues, "_I'll remember that day for the rest of my life but there is another day I'll remember, it has been engraved into my memory. The day that I heard that you had been shot. That was the day when my world shattered into a million pieces. That was a feeling that I never want to experience again not because you could've died….well that played a big role but what was worst you almost died without knowing something very important…" _Holly lets go of one of Gail's hands and reaches into her back pocket of her jeans and pulls out a purple velvet box, opens the box and reveals a white gold diamond engagement ring with two dolphins circling each other. A medium size clear blue diamond, the same colour as Gail's eyes set in the center. She then takes the younger woman's hand, _"I cannot imagine spending another moment of my life not being able to call you mine. Gail I bought this ring when I left for that conference that day, my plan was to ask you when I came back but you beat me to the punch. But I'm giving you this to show you that there is nowhere else I rather be, so will you?" _

Gail nods her head and sings yes to the world or anyone who would hear it. Holly places the ring on her fiancée's finger, pulling her in and they kiss like it was their first kiss after being separated for months. When they break apart all the blonde says is _"I can't wait to be yours and you mine."_


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER EIGHT**

_Holly's pov_

Things had been going smoothly for the past three months for Gail, although she isn't due to return to work for another three weeks or so. She has been really pushing herself, she joins Holly on her morning jogs, Holly hadn't been doing her usual ten kilometers instead they do three maybe four but for the past week Gail's been outdoing herself and doing five but it's taking a toll on her. This morning she stopped short of their usual rest stop, a diner they found a month ago. Holly didn't realize because she arrived first but when she didn't see Gail behind her, turning back was the only option. Finding her leaning up against a big old oak tree, Holly didn't rush to her side only because she assumed Gail was catching her breath.

It was only when she slid down the tree and fell to her feet. That action made Holly run towards her, well maybe you could say fly towards her. She didn't try helping her to stand she just knelt beside her. Holly used her hand to rub in small but gentle circular patterns on Gail's back and whisper comforting words in her ear. After about 15 minutes she looked up, her usually pale complexion now resembled one of snow. Gail is cold, freezing cold and her breaths are shallow unlike when she was grasping for air moments earlier. Holly's mind goes into overdrive, what could be wrong? There hasn't been any infection for months or complications with her, well at least what Holly had been informed of. She was in charge of all her medical choices and being her power of attorney so if anything is wrong she should know about it.

Holly takes her inside of the diner slowly thanking god that it is only about 15 yards in front of them, they walk slowly. Once inside she takes her to sit in the nearest booth and immediately asks for some room temperature water and she offers it to Gail but she's clearly still not strong enough to drink it. Gail doesn't even seem aware of her surroundings. As not to spook her Holly gives her a few minutes to take in her environment before she sits beside her making her take small sips of water.

Holly sees colour gradually return to her face and she is so relieved that she lets out a breath she didn't even know she was holding in. Thirty minutes later she see some more colour return to her face and take this time to inspect her closely; her skin isn't as cold, her breathing has returned to normal so Holly starts to talk to her.

"_Baby how are you feeling?" _She didn't want to barrage her with too many questions but she doesn't answer her at all, she just looks at Holly like a lost pup. She moves in a little closer still trying not to crowd her, then attempts to get her attention again. Raising her hand to Gail's cheek breaks her trance. She looks into Holly's eyes and she feels like she wants to cry, there is so much pain is behind her crystal blue eyes. Repeating once again but this time softly and she sees her open her mouth to answer but a faint whisper escapes, barely audible, if Holly wasn't sitting so close to her she wouldn't have heard it at all.

"_Holly, it hurts to breath, it all hurts and I don't know much more of this I can take."_

Holly's first instinct is to hug her and let her know she is right here next to her but then logic trumps emotions. She hears herself asking _"Where does it hurt? How long have it been hurting?"_ she gets no reply. _"Gail, sweetheart talk to me."_

Gail tries to answer but she can only mumble something before she passes out. Immediately Holly starts to panic, she pull out her cell phone and dials 911 and relays to them what's going on from a medical prospective not as the significant other. Dispatch informs her there they will send an available unit and she informs them that she's a cop in hopes that help will come faster. As soon as the call ends her phone rings, it's Traci. Holly answers frantically:

Traci: _"Hello how is my favourite couple doing?"_

Holly: _"Not good where are you? I need help asap its Gail."_

Traci: _"What happened? What's wrong with Gail?"_

Holly: _"We were running and everything was fine but then she started acting weird so I brought her inside the diner. I thought everything was alright only for her to complain of pain then she passed out. I called the ambulance but that could take a while, I would drive her but I need to keep a check on her vitals and I can't do that and drive. So can you come to diner off route 31?"_

Traci: _"I'm about five minutes away, keep her stable I'll be there soon. And we'll use my car with the siren blaring."_

The line goes dead and Holly is constantly checking the pulse of the younger woman while asking the waiters to help her get her fiancée into the car when their friend reaches. In less than three minutes Traci is there with Steve. He flies out the car over to Gail and he along with the waiters they quickly but carefully get Gail into the back seat of a black unmarked SUV. Holly is hot on their heels, she climbs in and sits with Gail's head resting in her lap. Traci jumps in and they speed off to the hospital siren blaring, they call ahead and inform the hospital they are on their way.

Gail is stabilized but something is wrong by the way the doctor takes his time in coming to inform them. He says that Gail is responding nicely to the meds but she has an infection. It can be treated but the blonde must stay overnight for observation. Holly is of course sad the younger woman has to stay overnight but is glad that it isn't too serious because God knows she couldn't handle any more bad news. She is informed that she can go see her but offers up the first visit to Steve and Traci first. They accept and go in to spend time with her while Holly gathers herself. She would really die if something life threatening did ever happened to Gail again and it makes her realize that anything could happen to Gail. She wants to treasure every moment they have together and this wedding is the perfect way to do this. Her thoughts are interrupted when Traci comes over to her, telling her Gail is awake and looks good and that she is calling for Holly.

Holly enters the room slowly with flashbacks to when she saw the younger woman in a hospital bed a couple of months ago but this time is different. There are no cuts and bruises no multiple wires attached to her and the best part she is conscious.

"_Holly, you're here and you look so beautiful. I am sorry I keep putting you through this…" _

The older woman interrupts, _"Honey, you have nothing to be worried about I will be here no matter what because that's what a marriage is supposed to be about. I know what I just said, I want us to get married soon I can't stand not being able to call you my own. Can we get married this month…maybe on the 26__th__? I honestly would do it tomorrow but I think we need a little more time. I want you to get your special day no matter what." _

"_The 26__th__ is our anniversary, three years babe. Yes yes yes! We can do it, we have most of the stuff ready. Just image in three weeks' time I'll be Mrs. Stewart" _Holly leans forward ever so gently and kisses her wife-to-be…

* * *

**Sorry it took so long to update been finding time was hard but I gave two chapters in hope too make up but one small issue the wedding scene. i have no idea how too approach...like do they wear dresses, vows (traditional, no traditional)**

**My next update will come but slow but ideas are welcomed**

**Thanks again for betaing: raggingscooter **

**Please review, PM, comment.**

**Tell next time...**


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